Monday 4th May 2020

I didn’t know what day it was all day. Why I thought it was Tuesday all day, I have no idea. It probably didn’t help that Alex didn’t have much work to do today so everything just blurred into one. He was hardly at the computer all day, so to even know it was a weekday was quite an achievement. The whole day I’ve been out of sorts, but it just seemed the world was out to pull me down. I remained pretty positive considering it seemed the universe was doing all it could to drag me down.

I should have known it was Monday though, shouldn’t I? After all, for me, it was the most Monday of Monday’s that there ever was. It was Monday alright and it was here to dampen my spirits as best it could. It turns out, even when you’re locked down and not working, Monday’s can still suck. But like every other time something knocks us down, we get back up, brush it off and start again. Tomorrow is a new day and I for one, cannot wait.

We went on our morning walk just after sunrise. Enough time had passed that sunrise was finished so by then the streets are empty. I just don’t think I’m ready to deal with 8pm mass exodus down to the beach. Somebody asked why it was so busy at the nighttime if nothing is open. The morning is much quieter as lots of people have returned to work, or people are still sleeping when it’s the morning slot. The promenade is relatively empty in the morning and there’s not a soul around the back streets. Much nicer than the evening slot. I don’t know if we’ll continue to go for long walks everyday, or start to reduce them a bit now the novelty is wearing off. Now I know we can, I don’t feel like we have to.

After all, we spent so long not going out at all that I’ve quite got used to it. It‘s surprisingly been relatively easy to just stay indoors all the time. After spending so long not going out, my legs and feet are starting to ache quickly from the massive influx in exercise and movement. I think it’s weird now that I don’t really have much of a desire to go outside. I’ve got used to my nestled, safe life indoors. We live in our own little bubble, and for now, I’m happy staying in our safe place.

It’s been uncomfortably hot in the apartment all day though and with the window having to be open to let some air in it’s been like an open invitation to every member of the insect species to come in and make themselves at home and enjoy a feast on me. Without sounding too bitter here, I’d love to know what makes the insects have such a field day on me yet barely ever touch Alex. It’s so not fair.

A meeting and some design work was on the working agenda today. I was a little nervous but it all went well. I sometimes don’t have the confidence in what I do know. What I’ve recently learnt in Bob Iger’s book is to have confidence in what I know though, but also have the confidence to admit he open about what I don’t know too. Knowing when to say hey you know I don’t know much about that so maybe that’s a role for somebody else or okay I’ve not got much experience in that part but I’ll give it a go! I’ve always been quick to pick things up, but I’ve not always had the confidence to admit that I didn’t know how to do it before I frantically crammed a crash course in it before walking in on my first day.

I had a message today that upset me a lot. One that made me feel like I was in the wrong, for not wanting to work for free. It’s one thing helping somebody out or sending a little catch up, but to have somebody work for free doing a full time job is preposterous. To then be made to feel bad about having to politely explain why it’s wrong just made me feel even worse. I’m still upset about it now as I’m sitting in a darkened room writing about it with sweat dripping from my forehead. Yes, it’s 11pm and it’s boiling. May has really turned the temperature up.

I’ve finished my most recent read so as per request, here’s what I’ve read in lockdown so far:

• Twenties Girl by Sophie Kinsella. Loved this one. Had real tears by the end. No doubt about it, it was a 5 star from me.
• I owe you one by Sophie Kinsella. Loved this one too. It was this book that made me go onto ibooks and buy all of Sophie’s books.
• The Mix Tape by Jane Sanderson. I just didn’t connect with this book and just didn’t love it. Even though I really wanted to.
• The man who didn’t call by Rosie Walsh. Quite enjoyed this book. Was curious to know what happened to him and was caught out a lot by twists and turns.
• The unhoneymooners by Christina Lauren. This was just the right amount of cheese and drama. I appreciated the regular Spanglish too.
• The Switch by Beth O’Leary. Really enjoyed this book after my friend recommended her books to me. This is Beth’s new book and it’s a storyline that had me gripped and wanting to know more.
• The woman who went to bed for a year by Sue Townsend. I really really really wanted to love this book. But I hated it. Why didn’t she just get out of bed? I love the Adrian mole collection so hoped I’d love this too. I didn’t.
• The Flat Share by Beth O’Leary. This book was 7 books ago!? I remember this storyline fondly and loved it from the get go. Really enjoyed the writing and the characters even though it took me a while to get used to the male diary entries and how they didn’t have pronouns. The Switch is much nicer written I think.
• Eleanor Oliphant is completely fine by Gail Honeyman. Absolutely fantastic book. Truly loved it. Would recommend it to everybody I know (and have done!). A wonderful and shocking storyline too.
• Never Greener by Ruth Jones. I bought this because I really enjoy Ruth Jones’ work, I mean hello Gavin and Stacey. This book did not disappoint. Could definitely see it as a TV series. Really did feel for all the characters at some point, which most books don’t seem to accomplish. Great character progression throughout.
• Everything I know about love by Dolly Alderton. I could take or leave this book. It was okay. I didn’t love it, didn’t hate it. It just passed some time. If you’re at a loose end then why not. She does seem to think she’s the only person in the world though that’s been to uni and had some wild nights.
• It’s not me it’s them by Joel Dommett. We couldn’t stop laughing at this audiobook. It’s made all the sweeter by Joel himself reading it. If you need a laugh, Joel’s audiobook will not disappoint.
• Girl Online by Zoe Sugg. I wouldn’t rush to tell anybody to read this, I was halfway through it about 3 years ago so just picked up where I left off. Cute enough story but was shocked to find out that it was ghost written!

I FaceTimed my family for a few hours in the afternoon before we had a chicken, tomato and mascarpone pasta dinner. As 8pm rolled around, we connected up the laptop and watched Asa’s Lockdown TV. I was obviously embarrassed when my face cropped up in my Vlog.

I posted another Vlog today on YouTube if anybody fancies checking it out. It’s taking you all on our walk with us around Poniente Benidorm during the lockdown. If you click the bold writing it will take you directly to the video. This one is showing you around Benidorm during the evening walk, and why although it was gorgeous to see sunset and be a part of the atmosphere and hear all the sounds, I just didn’t love it like the morning walks.

All in all, it’s not been the most wonderful of days. It’s just kinda passed by, but I think that’s perfectly okay. We all have these days that we just allow to slip by without having much love for them. But, I’m grateful for everyday that we are safe and eternally thankful for technology for keeping us all connected in these times.

Lots of bars have opened up here now but only operating as a takeaway service. You have to call or email ahead to get a pick up time for your takeaway. We probably won’t make use of any of the takeaway places as there’s not anywhere that we’re desperate for. When they do allow terraces to open though, I can’t wait to go to Javea and sit at those cocktail bars. They’re saying terraces for bars should be open next week, May 11th. That is also when they’ll start to let families go out in their cars again. I’m excited to go out in the car, I know Rio will be ecstatic to be in the car too. I’m just so ready to be able to sit in the car, drive to somewhere else in our province, have the music playing as we drive and then sit at a beach bar with a mojito. Bliss.

Hairdressers also opened today, but under very strict regulations. One member of staff and one client. Deep cleaning has to happen twice daily too and only with previous appointments. I wonder how people found it who went to hairdressers today. I bet it was a strange feeling.

We’re slowly dipping our toes into the new normal and what’s to be expected of what’s to come. I’m remaining positive that better days are coming very soon. Even if that does mean we have a few hurdles on the way and a few more obstacles to get by. But we will get by. We always do, don’t we?

Keep safe,

L x